Chicago, IL-A new board game involving heaving ladles of everyone’s favorite white fish has replaced Cards Against Humanity as the highest selling game in the country. The fish forward romp is as smart as it is raunchy and is the first game ever to take place entirely within the confines of a lukewarm crock-pot!
The game board itself can be setup in a jiff! Simply plug in the regulation and tournament approved Rachel Ray slow cooker, fill to the absolute brim with a 50/50 bag of cod and tilapia shards that have been foraged from your nearest retention pond and that you have pre-marked with different colored permanent markers to distinguish cod hunks or tilapia chunks. Set to keep warm first thing in the morning and wait in anticipation for guests to arrive eight hours later!
Once guests have arrived and commented on the lovely aroma spewing into your house, pour them a pint glass full of bottom-shelf silver rum with no ice and let the games begin! Sit around the crockpot in the shape of a rhombus and have everyone throw in a massive log of Grizzly chew, whoever pukes into the vase that looks like the bust of Robert F. Kennedy gets the first turn!
The player who starts the game must then put a condom on their hand and reach into the crockpot to “fish” out a handful of what is essentially Elmer’s glue at this point, place it in their mouth and try to catch the subtle notes of either cod or tilapia. There is a 30 second timer for the person to submit their guess, but because all of the permanent marker has melted off at this point, it really doesn’t matter.
The game concludes when the crockpot is gone, so sit back and prove how elegant and advanced your pallet is as you wrestle down a mouthful of boiled fish!