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Pixar announces plans for WALL-E 2: Sex Robot Elite

Hollywood, CA-Disney Pixar is ready to bring back one of its most beloved characters, only this time it can fuck. That’s right, the most beloved character in the Disney universe just got a lot more lovable. WALL-E 2: Sex Robot Elite documents a robot who has the capability to save mankind, but is ultimately used to pleasure varying losers who can’t manage to get laid by another human.

Reduced to a rolling pile of aluminum with several crudely fashioned glory holes and arms that have been swapped out for flesh lights, the new WALL-E model travels around the earth demonstrating the ability to solve for world hunger and cure cancer, but the ideas are ultimately disregarded in favor of a quick lay.

You’ll laugh as WALL-E meets varying zany characters all looking to jam their junk into something and ultimately cry when no one heeds to WALL-E’s advice and humanity goes quietly extinct. Fortunately for WALL-E he can continue to traverse the earth in solitude with memories of lovers past.

Critics are calling WALL-E 2: Sex Robot Elite “A summer romp for people who have a curiosity in the apocalypse and fuckable Disney robots,” so go see it today.