One Tie All Tie

It’s Confirmed…Interpol Sucks

Artist: Paul Banks
Album:Everybody On My Dick Like They Supposed to Be
Rating: 0.0/5.0
Release: January 2013
Download: Not providing because I don’t want this turd to get anymore downloads than it should
Best Line: There isn’t one coherent lyric so this is N/A

I’ve never really listened to Interpol, and now I officially never will. Paul Banks (allegedly lead singer of Interpol) released what I assume he believes is a hilarious parody on the mixtape subculture. This album stinks worst than that puddle of hobo urine that’s been rapidly incubating on the last car of a Red Line one stop before Howard, or that mysteriously stained SARS mask on the 66 bus,  or those tailgate farts that everyone always get that somehow always take on the same identity of cigars and yellow mustard. His attempt to be clever by using the contradiction in album title vs. content is a tremendous aberration at best. The album is disorienting to say the least, full of horrible sounding samples and more bloops and blips than PAT from the Disney Channel Original Movie SmartHouse.

I foresee anyone liking this being the same people that claim that Atlas Shrugged is their FAVORITE book, pickling, saying that they actually like more than one Ariel Pink song (Round and Round is the absolute only tolerable song) or people that claim Animal Collective is good live. A bombastic, highfaluting ode to pretentiousness. A true unlistenable chore. Thank you Paul Banks for eating goat cheese for a year and then passing this enormous chicken shit fart directly in our face.

Now that that’s all our, I feel like I have to share something worthwhile here, this JJ Doom song/video is disorienting in the right way and beyond dope: