One Tie All Tie

Diary of anyone using a rolling suitcase

Yawn what a gorgeous day to wander aimlessly in a high traffic area full of people attempting to get to work on time. The bridge by the Amtrak station seems delightful. I better pull my pear shaped body right out of this bed, change out of my pilled set of dull flannel pajamas and right into my finest high waisted khakis and Skechers shape ups.  Though I only have a laptop, I better make sure to use my suitcase with wheels as the doctor advised I should avoid any strenuous activities. This would clearly include subjecting myself to the immense weight of a laptop. I’ll make sure to add the handle extension so the bag is a full car length behind me…just for safe measure. Maintaining at least five feet between you and your suitcase is perfect for pacing; moving at more than 2 mph can be downright dangerous.

It really is a beautiful day out today, I’m well aware of that because I keep stopping abruptly to gaze into the sky. Plenty of people are staring intensely at me and my dragging suitcase, I’m glad they can admire such fine craftsmanship! They must also be applauding my adherence to the doctor’s orders. I’m approaching the bridge now; this is my favorite part of the day. Oh what? I think I see a quarter on the ground 20 feet to my right, I better bee line over there to pick it up. Woops turned out to be nothing, I’ll swerve back over to return to my original trajectory. It sure is busy today, I find it best to imagine myself the only person on the bridge it’s very calming and therapeutic. I simply will not be bothered by the sound of shoes hitting the back of my bag; the soft pitter patter is but a gentle thunderstorm in my head.

I’ve crossed the bridge! Now, time to get my bunions iced down ASAP, I should probably post a couple of pictures of favorite quotes on Instagram while I’m at it. Then it’s off to eat my body weight in Shrimp Diablo at the Rainforest Café.